To the Bogong moths and and their fallen comrades - we salute you. But maybe next year you should look away from the lights! Just a thought...
Tuesday, October 23, 2007
Sunday, October 21, 2007
October blues
At certain times I start to feel threatened and insecure especially when I think about my future. It brings me back to when I was about to finish university and I had to come up with some plans, which ultimately led me here. I feel like this type of decisions are just to big for me and I don't want to face it. Not now at least. Yet my mind keeps going back banging against these same questions "What am I gonna do after the master? What if I don't find a sponsor? Where should I go next?". All sort of bullshit.
Just three weeks ago I had a much clearer pictures of the projects ahead. And I still do, don't get me wrong. It's just that sometimes I remind myself that things might not turn out the I want them to. I take things for granted that I should not.
On top of that, I am having all sorts of traveling plans and I keep daydreaming of faraway places, backpacking adventures... I should really stop buying lonely planets just for the sake of having them. Those books make me wander off and lose my focus. It's just that I bought a while ago the India book and with yoga and all, I kinda feel like taking off for a few months...
Is this just the way my brain tries to avoid thinking about assignments, deadlines, exams, etc?
What is this?
I really do hope that my escapade to HK and then the trip to Europe will pacify my hunger for... I don't wanna say the word. Besides, today I got all excited cos I booked a few tours for our New Zealand trip. We're gonna swim with dolphins, which are amazingly curious and interactive creatures. I am so looking forward to this. I just watched a video where there is this pod of dolphins flipping around from one side to the other over the surface, all excited by humans. How crazy is that? That we are going to do in Kaikoura, at the beginning of our trip. Then quad bikes in Nelson (John's idea, but sounds like fun), rafting in caves (now this is something cool - haven't decided where yet, though) and bungee jumping in Queenstown. Thank god I have been saving for a year for this trip.
I am sure John and I will manage to fight from day one - as usual. Hopefully the beauty of the landscape will shush us both. Lately we have been a little bit distant from one another. I certainly am withdrawn and don't wanna be bugged. It's not bothering me that much, although I know that we really need to figure a few things out. I hope NZ will do us good.
TB is licking his left paw. Cute. I'm gonna go watch some Ally McBeal. I had never realized how crazy a bitch that woman is. She is selfish, hallucinating, honest. But we both daydream and fall to the ground on a regular basis, so I can't help but love her.
On top of that, I am having all sorts of traveling plans and I keep daydreaming of faraway places, backpacking adventures... I should really stop buying lonely planets just for the sake of having them. Those books make me wander off and lose my focus. It's just that I bought a while ago the India book and with yoga and all, I kinda feel like taking off for a few months...
Is this just the way my brain tries to avoid thinking about assignments, deadlines, exams, etc?
What is this?
I really do hope that my escapade to HK and then the trip to Europe will pacify my hunger for... I don't wanna say the word. Besides, today I got all excited cos I booked a few tours for our New Zealand trip. We're gonna swim with dolphins, which are amazingly curious and interactive creatures. I am so looking forward to this. I just watched a video where there is this pod of dolphins flipping around from one side to the other over the surface, all excited by humans. How crazy is that? That we are going to do in Kaikoura, at the beginning of our trip. Then quad bikes in Nelson (John's idea, but sounds like fun), rafting in caves (now this is something cool - haven't decided where yet, though) and bungee jumping in Queenstown. Thank god I have been saving for a year for this trip.
I am sure John and I will manage to fight from day one - as usual. Hopefully the beauty of the landscape will shush us both. Lately we have been a little bit distant from one another. I certainly am withdrawn and don't wanna be bugged. It's not bothering me that much, although I know that we really need to figure a few things out. I hope NZ will do us good.
TB is licking his left paw. Cute. I'm gonna go watch some Ally McBeal. I had never realized how crazy a bitch that woman is. She is selfish, hallucinating, honest. But we both daydream and fall to the ground on a regular basis, so I can't help but love her.
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